The Covert Cake Caper
by nipponophile
Summary: The Doctor isn't the only TARDIS resident who enjoys a bit of banana cake.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: The antics herein by characters owned by the BBC._

**The Covert Cake Caper**

The first time he had tasted it his face had screwed up so much she feared it might crack.

"Oh, c'mon, they're not _that_ bad, are they?"

"Donna, they're _awful_" he complained, as he moved quickly to the sink to inelegantly dispose of the offending mouthful.

She appraised the Twinkie, picked up on a brief Trans-Atlantic jaunt back to the 1980s, turning the package in her hand slowly.

"Well, they must have _something_ going for them, everyone in America seems to love them" she pondered, recalling Jack's glowing recommendation.

"Trust me, Donna, _that_," he jerked his head towards the small cake with a grimace, "has _no_ redeeming features whatsoever".

"In fact, I'm going have to make another pot of tea just to take away the taste" he complained, turning away from her to put the kettle back on the stove.

"Not that I don't believe you, but I might have to try it for myself," Donna said as she took a bite.

_Oh my gosh, he's right, that has got to be the _worst_ cake I have ever tasted._

And then the seed of an idea began to form in her mind.

Putting on her best 'delicious' face, she made a few pleasurable murmuring sounds as he turned back towards her.

He looked at her incredulously for a moment.

"Oh, no….Donna…You don't actually _like_ them do you?" he said in disbelief, his eyebrows raised at least a centimetre over the top of his glasses.

"Actually, I think they're quite tasty, in a kind of modern industrial way" she lied, convincingly she hoped.

He looked at her sceptically.

_Have to convince him somehow, _she thought.

So she pressed her lips together in grim determination and steeled her self to deliver what she hoped would be the clincher.

"In fact, I think I'll have another" she said, unwrapping one more of the cream sponge fingers and popping into in her mouth in one go "Mmmmm".

He turned away again in with barely-disguised revulsion.

"Donna, that's disgusting" he stated emphatically, reaching up into the cupboard to grab two tea mugs and missing her very obvious gulp that swallowed the cake whole.

"Well, I'll just put the rest of these treats in this tin here, shall I, you're not to touch, mind" she warned.

"Nothing to worry about _there_" he mumbled, casting a sideways glance at her as she put a tin marked 'DONNA'S' (underlined twice) containing the 'treats' on an upper shelf of the pantry.

Later that day, while he was out chasing up some unconfirmed reports of a rogue something-or-other that was causing the escalators in the Tube to keep reversing direction, she finished smoothing lemon icing on the cooled banana cakes. It was the second batch she had made in as many days, the first having been scarfed down in record time by a famished Doctor, before she even had a chance to take a bite. This time, she was taking no chances.

Standing back to appraise her work, she smiled to herself as she opened the 'DONNA'S' tin and placed the freshly-baked treats inside, before returning the tin to the pantry shelf. Then she cleaned up, removing all traces of her clandestine baking activities.

As she heard him return with a cheery "Don-na!" that indicated his mission had been successful, she quickly crept to the pantry to push the tin right to the back of the shelf, concealed in the shadows, before sashaying to the door to greet him.

After all, when it came to Time Lords and banana cake, a girl can't be too careful.


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: Just one of those little interludes that the Doctor and Donna's owner, the BBC, never showed us._

**The Covert Cake Caper Continues**

They burst into the TARDIS at full tilt, wild and out of breath. Donna leaned on one of the coral struts, red-faced, chest heaving and unable to speak for a moment, only turning her head slightly as the Doctor slammed the door shut behind.

"Could you perhaps cut things a _little_ closer next time, perhaps?" she grumbled at him "You know, because I really think I would have rather enjoyed getting impaled by a whole tribe of spear-wielding Sydderians with an irrational fear of red-heads..."

"Not completely irrational, actually, they were forced off their original home planet by a rather small, but aggressive band of tall, ginger-haired…."

Donna cut him off. "..and despite you already knowing this you still decided it would be a good idea to go there and 'take a bit of a look around'?" She was growing crosser by the minute.

"I didn't know the TARDIS had landed us there, Sydderia is actually 3.5 planets left of where I thought we were going…"

"_How _can you have half a planet, anyway?" She looked at him with a mixture of incredulity and annoyance. "You really should pay more attention when you're setting course, honestly, sometimes I think I drive the Old Girl better than you do."

The Doctor said nothing but just quirked one eyebrow very pointedly and a little dismissively at her.

"Alright then, you think you're such a good pilot, YOU can drive her next time, and let's see where we end up, shall we?"

She didn't flinch. "You are ON, Sunshine! You're going to be eating your words, just wait and see. The Old Girl loves me anyway, she'd never steer me wrong, would you now, sweetheart?" She turned to give one of the struts a soothing pat and was rewarded with a gentle, low hum in concurrence.

"Fine" the Doctor said, seemingly a little miffed. "I'm going to go take a wash". He turned to leave then paused, before turning back to her, his expression softening. "Why don't we sit down for tea and biscuits after? I could definitely use the sustenance." He looked at her warmly, the hint of a smile curling his lips. "Not to mention the company."

Donna couldn't help her anger just melting away at his unspoken apology.

"Alright then. I'll meet you in the kitchen in a few hours. I need a nice long soak in the bath"

* * *

><p>Two hours later, Donna, thoroughly relaxed from her bath, padded to the kitchen in her bathrobe and slippers. Putting the kettle on, she went to the pantry to get the biscuits, when she spotted her personal treat tin, marked <span>'Donna's'<span>. _Not _in its usual position. Suspicious, she pulled it down from the shelf, wrenched of the lid and gasped. The Twinkies were still there, of course, unloved, untouched and intact inside their plastic wrappers. Which was more than she could say for the iced banana cake she had baked only yesterday. It had _definitely_ seen some loving and touching and was now, in contrast to yesterday, only semi-intact.

_The cheeky git._

Obviously, the Doctor had somehow caught on to her little ruse, and had decided to help himself from her own, private cake tin. His extremely poor attempt to cover his tracks by replacing the tin on the shelf (not in exactly the same place mind you, and in any case, did he really think she wouldn't notice _half the cake _missing?) would have been amusing if Donna hadn't been so put out that he had ignored her explicitly-stated instructions not to touch the tin at all.

_Well, two can play that game, _she thought.

She left the kitchen and walked to the Doctor's room, putting her ear to the door to check he was still in the shower.

_Good_.

_Just enough time for a quick trip to the library before tea-time._

* * *

><p>Donna smiled to herself as she arranged the biscuits on a plate and placed them on the table with two steaming mugs of tea.<p>

"Oi, Spaceman, tea's ready!" she called.

"Coming!" She heard his voice echo down the corridors, followed by some possibly over-eager footfalls thudding rapidly in her direction.

His head popped round the doorway, slightly damp hair spiking in all directions and a happy smile on his face. "Right then!" He beamed. "Tea and biscuits! What could be better?"

Donna sipped her tea before fixing him with a long, serious stare and then, with a suddenly nonchalant air, said: "Oh, tea and _cake_ perhaps?"

The Doctor froze for a second, a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look marking his features. A few moments passed before he finally managed to speak, although it came it with a tell-tale-ish squeak. His eyes darted nervously down to his mug.

"Oh yes, tea and cake, of course, love a bit of tea and cake, although biscuits are also good, yes they are, we _do_ enjoy a nice biscuit, goes brilliantly with tea, just as good as cake really, and, depending on the type, sometimes even better…"

If the squeaky voice of guilt hadn't been enough of a give-away the babble of busted-ness certainly was. And he knew that she knew it.

"Donna, I'm so _very _sorry…." He began.

She moved to cut him off again. "What did I ask you? To _stay out _of my personal treats tin. Simple instruction, You have a big alien brain. Surely that wasn't too hard to understand."

The Doctor started to get flustered and indignant at the same time, making his face go slightly pink.

"Well, Donna, you haven't been exactly one hundred percent open and honest here either, you know" he remarked. "You led me to believe that tin contained only…only…._inedible…._treats, and yet I come back from yet another mission to keep the earth safe, suspicious smells of baked goods still lingering in the air…."

_Oops. She'd forgotten about his heightened sense of smell. Which came with his heightened senses of other things._

"…and yet when I ask you, you flat out deny that there has been any baking going on." He stopped then, fixed her with the hurt puppy eyes, then continued. "Why don't you bake for me anymore? I thought you _liked_ baking me things."

"I DO like baking you things, but just occasionally, I'd like to share in the eating! But you've usually scoffed the lot before I can get a look in edgeways!" She looked up at him through what she hoped appeared to be calming, alluring eyelashes that would also give him a guilt trip at the same time. "I didn't want to hide cake from you, but a girl gets desperate…" _And not just for cake._

She waited a beat.

"You do _want _to share stuff with me, don't you? You want to share with your _best friend_ don't you?"

His face instantly became on of anxious concern and he reached out to grasp her hands in his, soothing reassuring words pouring from his lips. "Of course, of course, Donna, you ARE my best friend and I DO want to share with you." _So much more than you know._

"Well, I'm certainly glad to hear that then," she said with a matter-of-fact tone and rose from her chair, grabbing their now-empty tea mugs and placing them in the sink. "Because I really _would _like to start baking again for you_. _For _both _of us." She smiled warmly at him, cupping his face tenderly with her hand.

Then, dropping her hand, she reached out to grasp his, giving it a little squeeze. "Right, shall we call it a night, then? I think we could both use a long rest after today's athletic endeavours".

"Sounds perfect" the Doctor agreed and they left the kitchen to head towards their bedrooms.

"Goodnight Donna, sleep well."

"Oh, and Donna?"

"What?"

"Thank you for being so understanding. And forgiving."

She leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek, causing him to smile shyly.

* * *

><p>It wouldn't have been even half an hour later when, just as she was about to put down her book, turn out the light and go to sleep, that she heard a familiar voice call out from….. <em>yes, sounds like he's in the Library<em>.

"Don-nahhhh!"

She felt the smirk spreading instantly even as he called out again, this time with an unmistakeable testiness.

"_WHERE_ are my jellybabies?"


End file.
